Setting the Stage for Successful Mediation
So you’re going to mediation, and you want to know: what’s the best way to set yourself up for success—or, put another way, what’s the worst way to set yourself up for failure?
Hi, my name is Carl Birkhead. I’m a Tulsa family law attorney with the Wirth Law Office in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I’ve been practicing family and criminal law for eight years, and I want to help make the law easy by talking about the dos—and, more importantly, the don’ts—of mediation.
Essential Steps to Prepare for Mediation
First, the do’s. Do show up prepared. That means knowing what you want to get out of mediation—not just your wish list of everything you hope for, but also what you’re realistically willing to give up. Mediation is about compromise. You won’t walk away with everything, but you’ll likely walk away with more than you might get if you went to trial and lost. Go in with both your goals and your concessions in mind.
Do make sure you and your attorney are on the same page. Are you going in intending to settle? Or is this just a formality so you can get to trial? If you’re not aligned with your lawyer on that, you’re setting yourself up for frustration.
Pitfalls to Avoid During Mediation
Now, the don’ts. Don’t sit in the same room as the other side if you can avoid it. Emotions run high in litigation, and mediation is no different. It’s much easier to think clearly and keep your cool when you’re in a separate room with just your attorney and the mediator.
Don’t be disrespectful. It doesn’t matter what the other side has done—even if they’ve hurt you, your family, or worse. Mediation is not the time for name-calling, yelling, or acting out. Be respectful to your attorney, the mediator, the other attorney, and yes, even the other party. You’ll get further with respect and calm behavior than you ever will with anger.
Final Thoughts and Preparation
At the end of the day, mediation is your best chance to have control over the outcome of your case. Take it seriously, prepare well, and keep your emotions in check.
If you have questions about what to expect or how to prepare for mediation, give me a call. I’d be happy to sit down, go over your situation, and build a game plan with you.
Schedule Your Strategy Session Today
My name is Carl Birkhead. I’m a Tulsa divorce attorney with the Wirth Law Office, and I want to help you make law easy. Contact me for a low-cost initial strategy session at 918-879-1681.
